kiss the stars with me

Cemetary
calm and peaceful
I feel warmth enveloping me

I think
I thought again of you
Why won't you go away

We only
Just met so briefly
But you've left an impression on me

I wish
I had let what almost
happened to happen

I can still
Hear your voice
And remember how it's soothed
this aching heart for just a few brief minutes
I'll treasure them

How you
quickly looked back at me
when you said something
you knew would've hurt me

Were you
Being tactful or a flirt
Either way in the end it hurt

Really badly
When I didn't let
what could've happened, not happen

Would it have been different?
Why would it have?

Yes, I am here

No, I don't want to be

Yes, I am single

No, I don't want to be

Yes, I am shy

No, I don't want to be

Yes, I am

No, I am not

Yes, I would love to
sit next to you and watch you smile

No, I will not say that to
you

Yes, I did love watching that movie

No, I didn't like the ending

Yes, you are still unaware

No, I am not over it

Yes, I still have

No, I won't say

Maybe, someday,
eventually, finally.

when i'm ready

Father's Day...

is over in Msia but I believe it's kinda soon in Australia. I don't know why we cant all have a standard date.

To my daddy who totally made my day today in his own cute, special way. I lvoe you so much. Thank you for making me feel so much better and bringing me back on my feet. Thank you for the laugh today and for being the bearer of great news with kong kong.

Filial daughter I shall try to be =D <3

dreamer

I'm leaving on a jet plane! My own private jet. it's only for the weekend. I'll be home for around 2 days an return on monday morning just in time for my class. I'm gonna be home! I'm gonna be able to see you kong kong. I'll hug you and kiss you on the forehead.

I'll hold your hand in mine, gently and maybe, just maybe you'll hold mine back. You would slowly curl your fingers in to cover mine. And you'll have your eyes open. They'll be wise and shining just like how I last remembered them to be. And you'll be able to tilt your head up and smile. That adorable, contagious smile. And maybe, just maybe you'll be able to recognize me. You'll say I'm your daughter's daughter. You'll say my name and welcome me home again.

In my dreams...

I still remember how my mummy used to warn me not to take afternoon naps in front of you because you might get irritated. But one afternoon I started dozing off and you saw me. I told you I was sleepy (ngantuk) and you even let me sleep in your bedroom, on your bed. You fluffed the pillow for me so i'd be comfortable. You got out a blanket for me even though it was 30 degrees and it was afternoon.

Mama used to get ticked off because you'd go to the coffee shop near your house everyday. When you were wheelchair bound you were still so restless you wanted to move around. It took nearly 10 months but you were getting stronger again. You were so so cute kong kong. You'd refuse to use yr stick when the maid told you to but when I gave it to you you'd use it. You even held my hand for support. And you even started drinking water and feeding yourself. You peeled that mandarin by yourself.

We were happy you were getting better again. I was happy you were getting better again. I thought everything was getting better. But kong kong why did you have to get up when there was no one around to watch you.

I'm gonna see you soon kong kong, but that'll only be in my dreams. If God loves me please let me dream about it. Please wait for me in December. I'll be back and I'm going straight away to see you. I promise. just wait for me kong kong. I love you, Tiffany sayanglu. Tunggu untuk aku ok?

wish I could wait...

I wanna go home! really really badly! How could they not have told me earlier! I don't know if I should be thankful or angry or upset. I'm obviously upset. Grandpa, kong kong I love you.. please please recognise me when I get back.

Please, I don't need to see you move your limbs again. I just need to hear that you CAN move them. I want to hear you speak again too. Why why why?! Why wasn't there anyone looking after him. Dear kong kong they kept the news away from me for a week.

one week he was in there for one week and they only told me 4 hours ago!! I could have booked flights in advance and be on the plane right now. I want to cry I AM crying!! why does shit after shit happen! Grandpa I lvoe you I hope you hear me, please move again, be good to the doctors and doctors please be good to him. You're so fragile. I love you so dearly. You need to eat again. I can imaigne you with tubes.. again..

I wanna go home...

please don't shrug me off your shoulders

happy today, reasonably anyways :)

DAMN THEM!!!!

I cannot believe uni changed my timetable! I am so unbelievably angry right now I have to vent! Now I'm not in the same urban tute as James and sya sya and cute guy in leather jacket and super nice tutor! I hate this shit. And I hate the weekends even more! They don't work during weekends so I can't go over and get it changed personally!

I'm incredibly pissed I cannot describe how pissed I really am! Okay not pissed just upset atm. Very very fucking upset!!! I don't give a damn about my natural tute because I had a crappy tutor anyways. die die die
! ASDFGHJKL